Or this March does anyway.
March is my month of love, but this March is a month of last chances and lost hopes. We're mving on to IVF.
The slight spotting got heavier last night before I went to bed. The cramps became undeniable, so bad they even woke me up in the middle of the night. This morning, it is clear that Violetta has given up and let her Auntie take over.
I've got my call in to the nurse to report my result. The call that was supposed to be saying I was coming in for my bloodwork. Instead, I reported the end of my cycle. But I still asked to come in for blood work. This cycle was different. The luteal phase was the longest it's ever been post IUI. The cramps and back achse are very intense, and I want to know if this is a chemical. I want to know that I've actually managed to conceive more than once in almost two years. I want more attention paid to my luteal phase. I want more data so someone can figure out why this isn't working.
Luckily, on the good advice of the nurses, I scheduled my IVF consultation when I had my IUI, so I don't have to wait weeks upon weeks. It is this coming Monday morning. Next Friday, we leave for our week in London with my 9.5 month old neice. A little family fun, a little regroup, and then it's time to really get this party started.
Now, I just have to make it through this day without breaking into tears at my desk. It's already proving difficult.
Oh Jen...I can't tell you how sorry I am. I (like you) really truly thought this was it. Although, I'm curious to see what your b/w shows...
ReplyDeleteToday will be hard..maybe even the week..but I hope you're able to find some renewed hope in your upcoming IVF cycle. Wish I could give you a big hug.
I'm so very sorry. I was truly hoping for you with this one. I do hope that your time in London allows you to get away from this for a bit before taking the next step to IVF. And I hope that your IVF cycle comes quickly, and moves forward with swift success.
ReplyDeleteI'm so very sorry :( It was all looking so promising there. Hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteUgg...that sucks.
ReplyDeleteI hope the trip to London is what you need to relax a bit!
I'm sorry Jen :( I hope you have a great trip to London and then get back intot the swing of things with IVF. hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteOh, I'm so sorry, I was hoping to check in and get good news.
ReplyDeleteSorry girlie! I know how completely disappointing it can be when you finally have some hope and it gets dashed.
ReplyDeleteI hope you can find some peace while on vacation and find your way when you get back.
I'll be in the same position as you, so we'll work on getting through it together.
All the best, MissConception
So sorry. I hope that you have a lot of time for fun and regrouping on your trip and that you can move forward with IVF when you return. Thinking of you!
ReplyDeletesorry love. I really am. Sending you lots and lots of hugs.
ReplyDeletesorry to hear, can't imagine how hard of a day it must have been. am glad however that your consult is scheduled and that you saw improvement in your lp- hope the trip brings some laughter and fun :)
ReplyDeleteJen, I'm so sorry to hear this news. I thought this one really might be it. :(
ReplyDeleteI really hope you have a wonderful time in London, and can set all this aside for a bit.
I am so sorry to hear this....
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a fantastic time in London and are able to relax and forget about the IF world for a bit.
I'm so sorry to hear this. I know how disappointing and devastating it is to get your hopes up every month, only to have them come crashing down. Have you ever used progesterone supplements or had your progesterone levels tested during the LP? I'm glad you asked to have the bloodwork done now. The unknown is just so frustrating. Enjoy your time across the pond and a few pints of ale while you are there!
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